I will admit that I am a bit of a control freak in my territory….my territory meaning anything that is mine, I will claim as mine, I drive, I wear, I sit on, I use, I look at on occasion….get the picture??? (My territory is huge lol). Well, I’m guessing you as an adult got what I just wrote, especially if you have kids in your house that are forever “borrowing your things” or worse…make a mess and don’t clean up behind themselves. For some unknown reason my kids cannot get this small, minor, obviously insignificant issue I have. They live in oblivion since the ripe old age of 13.
I’ve made posts on social media warning the cohabitants of this house what would happen if they continued on the road they are going on, yet they still push on???!!!! What??? Let me set the scene for you….I will vaguely describe some things that absolutely have been preached, taught, drawn out on a chalk board, smoke signals sent through the sky and yelled out numerous times in these kids lives. And yet….here we are 24 years later…(if you heard a sigh, that was me exhaling to get a grip before I start)……
OK, when my kids were smaller, I really had no issue with them keeping their room neat and clean, chores done…eating in their rooms…they were well organized kids with strict routines that they had to adhere to the rules of the house..and they did. Somewhere in the last decade something has went horribly awry! So if my kids happen to read this blog, 1) know that I love you dearly and I am blessed that God chose me to raise you, 2) both of you are my world and I would do absolutely anything for you….with that being said, let me clearly explain for you what I’m trying to communicate here, remember children…even though I love you…you are getting on my last stinking nerve!!!
I will not pick up your wet towels thrown on the floor after you shower, I will not sit down to use the bathroom and look at an empty toilet paper holder, I will not wipe nor scrap excess toothpaste out of the sink because you are too lazy or in too much of a hurry to wash that out. (OMG……sometimes there is enough of excess toothpaste in the sink I feel we could fill half a tube!!!) Please, for the love of God if you use a blow dryer, straightener, hair gel, razor, clippers, floss, or any other type of product in the bathroom…..PUT IT BACK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!
Let’s talk about your rooms – (ok, I just took a really deep breath hoping that technique will alleviate the irritation I am feeling right now) your rooms….they were once cute, straightened, organized, Pinterest worthy pictures of lovely bedrooms that you could call your own and have your own fun space. A beautiful world of your very own that I spent hard earned money to give you. Now, after many years and more money buying new furniture, paint, carpet, light fixtures, etc. to give you that new “grown up” room….somehow it looks like a guys dorm room, in both your rooms!! Yo, I cannot take that! While we are talking about your rooms, why is it that you can live like that until one day it pops into your head to do a major Spring Clean? And then you fill up my trash cans full of your mess. I mean you fill the trash can up till it looks like the Leaning Tower of Pisa, I mean really….Jenga at it’s finest! OMG…EMPTY THE TRASH!! Or Lord forbid you take 15 extra steps and dump your trash outside. No, that would take to much energy….(insert eye roll)!
I won’t embarrass you about the condition I see your rooms at times, but let’s move on to other things….shall we??? Let’s talk about washing and drying YOUR clothes. Yes, I work from home, but NO…I am not your personal maid. Ok, when you put a load in the washing machine, Ummmm….how about moving that load over to the dryer so another load can be started. No…you throw your clothes in the washing machine and then just forget about it. How do you FORGET about it?? You pass it multiple times a day and we have front load washer and dryers…..you can see right in there!! So, your clothes now smell sour because of your oblivion to the laundry room. It’s like that room only exists to dump clothes in….not remove them at all. Geez……oh, and let’s not forget how you may dig through your clothes in the dryer..find what you want and walk away. I mean leave dry, clean clothes on the floor and keep hitting rocks in the morning to go to work. (WHAT?????? REALLY?????)….face in the wind, throwing a pair of deuces up as you walk out the house. REALLY???? Do you have any clue how annoying this is…..I literally want to put padlocks or even better….buy washer and dryers where you need change to use them. Yes….that is GENIUS!!! I must look into this….
Ok, let’s talk about chairs and stools. I have this obsessive compulsion to make sure everything is lined up in its correct spot. Which means the stools at the bar need to be pushed back under the bar. Oh hey, lets talk about what’s on the bar for a moment. Kids, it’s great you buy your own food here and there, but do you really not know what to do with that empty McDonald’s cup after 3 hours of it sitting on the counter? Another good one- when you fix you something to eat…let’s start wiping those counters down. I am sick and tired of wiping up crumbs from kids that are sooo concerned about cleanliness and mummy wrap your hand after using the bathroom to wipe your bum….yet looking at crumbs or food spilled on a counter means nothing. I don’t get it…..where is your line drawn in the sand? Only on the mummified hand????? ( crumbs cause bugs…JS) (Let’s talk microwave issue face to face kids… 🙂 Oh, and for the record….clear the countdown on the timer….never leave it on a number—drives Barry INSANE!!
I don’t mind letting my child borrow my clothes, handbags, shoes, etc., but something that really irks me is when no one has asked. They have rummaged through my drawers, closets, makeup, makeup tools……and the all powerful sock drawer, took every sock I own, and no one knows how anything got missing. I mean, this morning I had a set of shoes –a left one and a right one–now I have just a right one. What the heck happened??? Oh my and let’s talk about eyeliners….DO NOT USE MY MAKEUP AND TOOLS–IT’S NOT SANITARY!!! You have your own, Chase you know this is geared towards you!!!!! HAHAHA. …got ya…….it’s really geared right down the dead center to my little Rae Rae!
Enough of that, let’s move on to more things. Let’s talk refrigerator kids. I mean…you don’t buy anything to put in there, yet that door opens more times a day than the winner of a HotDog Eating Contest can eat a hotdog in 10 minutes! It would be nice to occasionally clean out your mess….how hard could this be? It seems you just keep pushing it towards the back of the refrigerator thinking it will eventually drop off the shelf and out of sight..I’m guessing?? And if you drink the last of the milk and there is no more than a table spoon of milk in it….lets do everyone a favor and dump the empty milk jug!! Dear Lord…give me patience….#recyclebincanbeused
Cereal boxes, cookies, chips……they all have clips or larger Ziploc bags for these to be placed in. Why you ask? So the food won’t stale and hey….remember me telling you about bugs, well mice get in too and I certainly do no want to see one walking across my counter with a Dorito in one hand an Oreo in the other. And while we are in this section of the house….shut all cabinets and drawers please! Dirty dishes go in the dish washer…not the sink. Ya got that kids?? I mean, I need a vacation right now guys!
Seriously, you guys wonder why mom doesn’t work out in public….well, this house would absolutely go right down the drain! I mean, I’ve got tons of work just in the garage area to do. Oh Lord, I pray that you put a want and desire in my kids to be clean, tidy and well organized. Both kids are brilliant in their own way, but dang…..when you are stealing my socks (and I mean all 20 pairs of mine….I have none) because you can’t muster up the energy to wash your 10 loads……Houston, we have a problem !!
OK…I’ve vented…any other moms feeling the pain?? Can I get an AMEN???!!
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